Bhains ke aage been bajana

Being an avid net surfer, I stumbled upon Boloji.com one day, where I happened to read the meanings of ‘Jiski laathi uska bhains’ and ‘Bhains ke aage been bajaana’ in English.

I got a little nostalgic. I remembered how my teacher would make us repeat ‘muharavas’ or ‘kahavats’ with their meanings again and again during our Hindi classes. Those days, teaching was not as exponentially experimental as it is today. We learnt everything in the same boring and traditional manner, where the instructor/teacher was expected to have a motor mouth which by the way, was considered a plus unlike today. Ironically, the students were expected to perceive teachers as epitomes of silence or reservation. Most teachers loved their own voices. They spoke and spoke --- like I do today, which I guess, is a fallout of that training. When the class ended, the teacher would go and tell the teacher of the next section that we were a bunch of non-responsive children, fit only for a silent prayer service. Considering our class was one helluva class of monkeys, the ill informed lady had trouble in hand. But I must say, I always marvelled at the teacher’s oratorial power - (read - vocal power) that kept our class silent during her sessions!

One cheeky ‘miss-somebody’ suggested that it was time we let our teacher know that our muhavaras were well in place and that there was no need to create a ‘phata gramaphone’ of us that repeats the meanings a zillion times. She had the nerve to call a meeting which by no means was to be taken lightly. For me, it was something unfathomable. I was always this good child who hated making fun of my Gurus. Having been ingrained by my parents that Vidya comes to those who respect their Gurus, I declined being part of the unruly group of silly, spoilt brats.

Well, no one really bothered me thereafter, thankfully!

Time passed. One day the intercom beemed. The principal announced that with the onset of winter, practices for sporting activities would begin. There would be two months of rigorous workouts before the annual sports meet. One of my classmates and friend was participating in the prelims of two events and the march past, like most of us. She had to spend a good 1 hour everyday practicing both at home and in the school after dismissal. Being her friend, it was obvious that I wanted her to win in the events she had selected. No one was sure which side the breeze would blow on the D day. There were too many champions vying to qualify for the next round. Besides, there was a hitch--- some of this teacher’s favourites were there too. We called them the ‘crammers’ of the class who spent most of their time cramming and plotting against the others, or the real champions. Most of my classmates disliked this coterie of 4. They could have utilised their time in better strategies, I felt. Knowing them full well, I somehow felt that there may be some politicking in the end and my friend may not be able to make it to the prelims honourably. But perseverance was what I believed in. I kept encouraging her.


As days passed, the foursome's power seemed too well known. They were ubiquitous. Their names figured on top in all the events they had selected. They even got special permission to participate in 2 more events, thanks to this teacher’s efforts. This infuriated the others since it was against the rule. My friend had one last hope…to win the 400 meters relay or forget about sports. She got more and more diffident with time.


Seeing her plight, I went upto a senior friend of mine who was a thoroughbred where sporting activities were concerned, and explained my friend’s problem. Being our senior and avid sports person, I knew our didi could give my friend some valuable tips. During our discussions, didi said that she had found something going wrong in all the events that were handled by 'our' teacher. She was shocked to know that some girls were allowed to participate in more than two events despite the rule. She asked my friend if she was ready to participate in Kabaddi as well. My friend was more than willing but what about the rule? She said.. ‘Chuck the rule! It has already been flouted. What is the problem if you participate in one more event? After all, you are doing it when a new rule has been set!! And yes, this time, for Kabaddi, you must use ‘Bhains ke aage been bajaana’ as your chant or refrain. You need to fit that well into the game. Do practice using that. If these ladies are upto something you can do something too. Remember, you can do it ‘your way’ now. The tables are turning so make the most of it. Distract the team with these lines especially when the ‘teacher’ is around. For the 400 mts relay, keep chanting ‘Jiski Laathi Uska Bhains.’


In those days, all school sporting activities were held in the nearby stadium. Our teachers had allotted the seating arrangements for each class in the pavilion.

After the march past, drills and other such event practices, the qualifier events to enter the semi finals began. I parked myself in the ideal place in the pavilion from where I could have a good view of Kabaddi and the 400 meters relay.
Some of my other friends joined in to cheer the participants of the track and field events. The much awaited 400 meters relay began amidst the din of the cheering crowd. My friend gave me a slight smile from the track as if to say, ‘wait till I qualify.’ I was surprised to see her new found confidence. I waved in response and smiled.
On your mark,---get set and the whistle blew! My friend (the first one to hold the baton), ran as if the world would end if she did not. She kept chanting ‘Jiski laathi uska Bhains’ with great felicity and quite loudly too so that everyone could hear, especially our teacher who stood near the tracks, ostensibly to maintain discipline. The progress of the race seemed good for my friend. She was ahead of the other teams. Within minutes, she handed the baton to the next person who continued the race.


When the race ended, some teachers gathered near the finishing line. There was some commotion. Some were seen arguing with the sports department of the school. Our teacher, as expected was there too. We wanted to have a better view of what was happening so we came down to the field. One of the foursome had complained that my friend had been distracting her on the tracks by saying something stupid… that it was meant to insult her in some way…and so she went on and on.

The arguments went on for sometime and then my friend was called by the sports master. With an innocent face, she said, ‘Sir I am so sorry if this has distracted my friend but my intention was to boost my inner spirits before the race. You see, the baton reminded me of my teacher…er..I mean…the muhavara she taught, and considering our teacher makes us chant the muhavaras a million times a day, I thought I must use it on the field too. It gives me an amazing feeling sir and the effect is that my team has won.’ The sports master looked confused but he could not detain her or disqualify her on any grounds.

He turned to my teacher and said, ‘Madam, I think we are making a mountain out of a mole hill. This girl has not flouted any rule applicable to this event so let us not waste time discussing this.’ The matter ended there and my friend and her team were cheered again.

The foursome’s confidence level seemed to be at its ebb. We were all happy for our friends and ran to congratulate them. My friend told me that she was now a little nervous because the next event, Kabaddi, was not something she could pride herself on. Didi came our rescue. She assured that nothing could go wrong if the strategies were well in place. More than brawns, we needed brains to tackle the stupid competitors and the teacher who did not understand the game well.

Encouraged, my friend moved to the field. When the game began, a huge crowd gathered near the field. Kabbaddi..kabaddi…. kabaddi kabaddi----it went on. When my friend’s turn came, she began her ‘Bhains ke aage been bajaana, bhains ke aage been bajaana’ much to everyone’s surprise. The amused crowd followed suit. ‘Bhains ke aage been bajaana…bhains ke aage been bajaana…’ The school band too joined in….the drummer yelled… bhains ke aage been bajaana…dhum dhum….bhains ke aaage been bajaana.. dhum dhum ….within minutes, the game was over! My friend’s team won again. The crowd cheered, many of whom were part of our squad. They lifted and threw my friend up in the air. She had finally qualified for the semi finals. The knocked out team was crest fallen. The notorious members had little to do but scream…cheating cheating…!

My friend looked at them and said, ‘you get what you deserve, but nowhere does it say we cheated!


You want to know what happened in the finals? You guessed it right! My friend’s team won the trophy. They had changed some ‘strategies’ and this time, to everyone’s surprise, our teacher was with the real champions. Besides, she was highly pleased with my friend and her team for taking ‘muhavaras to the sports field’. Little did she know that we had been digging at her in this whole exercise. The cheeky miss someone, thoroughly amused, was heard saying, ‘Agar Bhains ke saamne been bajate rahe to thak jayenge. Vo naachne wali nahin! Let us now leave it at that. Kam se kam, humara kaam toh hua ...aur (with a twinkle)..humne vakya bhi bana liya!!!’